Book Review: Boundaries in Dating by Henry Cloud and John Townsend

Genre: Self Help on Dating and Relationships

Favorite Quote: “Freedom and responsibility are necessary for love to develop in dating. When two individuals allow each other freedom and take ownership of the relationship, they are creating an environment for love to grow and mature.”

You’ll like this if you like: Cultivating Healthy Relationships, Boundaries by Henry Cloud and John Townsend, or Self-Improvement.


From Amazon

Rules for Romance That Can Help You Find the Love of Your Life
Between singleness and marriage lies the journey of dating. Want to make your road as smooth as possible? Set and maintain healthy boundaries–boundaries that will help you grow in freedom, honesty, and self-control.
If many of your dating experiences have been difficult, Boundaries in Dating could revolutionize the way you handle relationships. Even if you’re doing well, the insights you’ll gain from this much-needed book can help you fine-tune or even completely readjust important areas of your dating life.

Boundaries are essentially lines you draw to protect yourself spiritually, emotionally, and physically. Healthy boundaries ensure that we remain individuals, that we have our own opinions apart from those around us. Good boundaries also prevent us from crossing other people’s boundaries. They help us respect ourselves and respect others. Many people with poor boundaries are viewed as nice, because of their compliance and aversion to conflict, but especially in a dating relationship, poor boundaries are unhealthy.
Boundaries in Dating covers all of the basics–from being honest in a relationship to respecting each other as equals and individuals. I felt like I’d already heard and practiced a lot what this book taught, but it never hurts to have a reminder, and I’ve noticed I’ve been more protective of my own boundaries and opinions since.
If you’ve ever asked for any relationship advice, you’ve probably heard “Be honest,” “Be open,” “Be vulnerable,” or “Communicate openly.” As you probably know, it’s a lot easier to glaze over the truth than to be completely honest. For me, this is especially true where personal opinions are concerned. I’d much rather tell someone what they want to hear rather than what I honestly think. A good portion of this book was on being honest about your expectations, preferences, and feelings.”Be honest” might be a clichéd piece of advice, but I doubt that it can be given too many times.
While it was nice to learn a few new tidbits of information and to be reminded of old information, there were some chapters I was half-skimming, half-reading. Some basics of relationships I struggle with, but I’ve found that there are many things I’ve learned naturally–like not leading a guy on who you wouldn’t want a long-term relationship with. There are so many fundamentals covered in this book, I’m sure you’ll find yourself skimming some things too. If you do, just remember that there’s probably valuable advice elsewhere in the book, so don’t toss the whole thing away. 😉

Read a Free Sample of Boundaries in Dating

What difficulties have you encountered in relationships? What difficulties do you think you would encounter? Have you ever struggled with boundaries in dating?


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