Sometime last year, I had a crush. It was a weird crush mainly because I didn’t want it. Though I liked this guy as a friend and loved talking to him, the idea of being in a relationship held no appeal whatsoever. Since I prided myself on my self-control and will-power (and still do), it was really hard not to detest myself. After all, these were my feelings I had to deal with, and it was my fault. I tried all sorts of things to get it to stop. In fact, I even memorized pi to the 90th digit after the decimal point. Every time I would think of this guy, I would memorize a few more digits. In the end, I did stop having a crush on him, but only after months and months of struggling with my own feelings.
And now I’m worried I’m encountering a similar problem. I’m using all sorts of mental tricks to try and change my mindset and control my feelings, but it’s taken an enormous amount of patience and persistence. Dread would coil in my stomach at memories of last year, because I feared this would be a repeat.
Until yesterday.
Yesterday, I remembered that though I might do my best to make the right decision, the decisions in my life are no longer mine to make. And it’s not only decisions. My heart is no longer mine either.
“And let Thy goodness like a fetter
Bind my wandering heart to Thee
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it
Prone to leave the God I love
Here’s my heart, Lord, take and seal it
Seal it for Thy courts above.”
-Come Thou Fount
Even though my heart is a wayward little thing, it too belongs to God.
I know I’ve touched on this before, but I’m a rather stubborn person. In fact, stubbornness (or drive, ambitiousness, willpower, persistence, etc.) seems to be one of my most potent strengths and debilitating weaknesses. I had to learn it last year when I won governor at TeenPact, earlier this year, when I gave an important life decision to God, and now I’m learning it once more. I just have this natural urge to fight my own battles and make my own decisions.
But this isn’t my battle anymore. I’ve submitted to God and His yoke, which mean that I’m going to let Him do the heavy lifting. Knowing me, I’m going to have to keep giving this to God, over and over and over, but if that’s what it takes, then I’ll do it.
So, how do you give something to God, whether it be a battle, problem, or decision?
- Pray—tell God you’re giving this to Him.
- Give thanks—thank God for taking this burden.
- Quit Worrying About it
- Repeat
Step 3 is pretty hard for me, but it’s one of the most important parts. You can say anything you want to when you pray, but when you choose to quit worrying about it, when you have enough faith to be at peace, then that’s when your attitude backs up your words.
And finally, here’s how you know if you’ve truly given something to God:
When you focus more on God than you do your problem.
Have you ever struggled to give a situation to God? If so, what?